We offer support services to help you choose what is right for you and your child because we understand an unplanned pregnancy can create pressure, confusion, anxiety and a sense of urgency, We are here to help, not judge.
If you choose to place your child for adoption, we provide:
Pregnancy counseling – Adoption counseling before and after placement – Home visits if needed – Assistance in choosing and meeting a family for placement – Planning hospital stay – Determining how much contact you want after placement – Transportation to doctor’s appointments
Case management – Limited financial assistance
If you are facing an unplanned pregnancy and need help, please call, email or write us today. We find joy in helping you see the hope and possibility for your child, whether that is through adoption or parenting.
You do not have to be Catholic to receive our services. Services are free to you and are always confidential.
If you are considering placing your child for adoption, here is a simple outline of how the process works from start to finish:
Step 1 – Contact us
Talk to an adoption/maternity specialist.
Step 2 – Receive information about adoption
We’ll meet at a place of your choosing – our office, your home – wherever is most comfortable for you. At that time, we will talk about the adoption process and review potential adoptive families.
Step 3 – Discuss available assistance services
Step 4 – Select the best home and family for your child
Identify the qualities you want in adoptive parents and review the profiles of prospective parents. Select a family when you’re ready, and meet with them face-to-face if you choose.
Step 5 – Delivery
Determine how much care you want to provide for the child at the hospital. Place the child with the adoptive parents at the hospital, and 7-10 days after delivery go before a judge at the courthouse to sign relinquishment papers.
Step 6 – Post Adoption Services
If you have elected, maintain contact with the child and adoptive family and receive e-mails, phone calls and photos of the child. Receive ongoing support and counseling. Upon the 18th birthday of the adopted child, you can determine if they may contact you or have a copy of the court transcript.
1. Can I choose my own doctor?
Yes, you can choose your own doctor. If you do not have medical care or insurance, we will assist you in obtaining both.
2. Can I choose the adoptive family for my child?
Absolutely! You get to choose the adoptive family. Each adoptive couple has been carefully screened and has and must have an approved Adoptive Home Study. You will decide if you want to meet them and how much contact you will have after placement. Openness in adoption means openly sharing information about the child. Open adoption means open communication, not co-parenting. You will provide your medical history to the adoptive family for the benefit of the child. They will openly provide information to you about them.
3. How are adoptive couples screened?
Before adoptive couples are approved to begin the adoption process, Catholic Charities reviews and verifies the following:
There are no perfect couples. We are looking for couples of all faith who, with God’s help, work with one another to solve life’s problems and are called to accept children into their family through adoption. The couple will participate in individual and joint interviews, and allow a visit in their home.
4. If I choose adoption, will I be able to see my baby?
You will decide how much contact you wish to have with the adoptive couple and the child, then you will select an adoptive family that has the same desires. Some birth parents choose to have no contact with the child. Many exchange photos through e-mails and maintain phone contact. Others have visits several times a year.
5. I have other children. Have you had others who have placed a child for adoption and also continued to parent their other children?
Yes! We help women of all ages with different situations and circumstances. Some are pregnant for the first time, while others have experienced pregnancy and are parenting other children.
6. I am the birth mother and do not live in Oklahoma. Will you help me?
Give us a call and we can discuss it. State laws vary from state to state. We should be able to help, but if not, we will help you find someone in your area who can!
7. What about the father? How much will he be involved?
We welcome and encourage all birth fathers to be involved in the adoption plans if he is willing and it is possible. Sometimes the father is actively involved and supportive of the adoption plan. Other times, he does not acknowledge the pregnancy and does not want to be involved. At times, we have requested paternity testing. Like you, he will be asked to come to court seven to ten days after the delivery to sign the relinquishment papers. Sometimes he will be able to sign papers before delivery.
8. Is financial assistance available?
Yes. Catholic Charities may help with medical, housing and clothing needs as long as they pertain to the pregnancy. Any expenses must be approved by the court.
9. Do I have to pay for legal and medical fees?
No, you will not be responsible for any of the legal or medical fees that are connected with the pregnancy or adoption. However, all expenses paid on your behalf by Catholic Charities must be approved by the court.
10. Do I have to tell my parents about the adoption?
If you are over the age of 18, you do not have to tell your parents. If you are living with or supported by your parents, it is usually best to include parents in that decision. If you have not told your parents, we can help you see this through.
11. Can I ever get my child back? Is it permanent?
Catholic Charities Adoption Services receives children and asks the court to put into place the adoptive plan of the birth parent. When you go to court, you are asking the judge to terminate your parental rights. It is the job of the court to determine if this is in your best interest and the best interest of the child. When the court terminates parental rights, the judge is convinced that your decision is voluntary, without force or pressure from anyone and there is no fraud. It becomes almost impossible to reverse that decision. The court honors the request of the birth parents to assist them in making a plan of adoption for the child. It is very timely and costly to reverse that decision. Therefore, think through this decision carefully, because it is a permanent decision and one that impacts so many people.
Krysti Alexander, M.Ed.
Phone: 405.523.3000 ext. 121
Fax: 405-523-3030
Willow Pregnancy Support (Free pregnancy tests)
4701 S. Western
Oklahoma City, OK 73109
405-631-4477
www.willowpregnancy.org
HeartLine (Community Resources Directory)
Emergency Hotline Number: 211
www.referweb.net/hlok/
Section 8 Housing
www.ochanet.org
Infant Crisis Services
www.infantcrisis.org
Family Expectations
www.familiesok.org
St. Vincent de Paul
www.svdpokc.org/locations